Friday, April 17, 2015

Dear Pokey:

I can’t tell you how much I miss your furry face. Life isn’t the same since you left for kitty heaven twelve years ago. I now take my naps alone on the bed instead of lying on the floor with your tiny wet nose in my face and your soft purring lulling me into deep slumber. You were always happy when I woke up and looked into your beautiful loving green eyes. Your loyalty was unwavering, and I have no one’s fur to cry into anymore either. Oh, my, Pokey. I truly miss you.

I thought you’d like to know what’s been going on since you left. Here are some highlights:

  1. no one talks, spells or writes cursive anymore; people communicate by tapping
  2. no one eats fatty food anymore, except people who are obese, and you’re not allowed to call them “fat.”  
  3. there’s no room to sit on planes anymore, and people throw tantrums in the aisles and make bombs in the bathrooms
  4. people burn their skin with pictures to look cool
  5. big butts are in
  6. France has threatened to fine any model who is too skinny
  7. I still don’t cook with more than two ingredients
  8. your Dad still loves leftovers (some from over a year ago)
  9. your sisters are all married with kids
  10. we have moved to another state, and your father wants to move to yet another (I told him to let me know how that works for him:)
  11. people take their dogs everywhere:  the hair salon, bars, restaurants, doctor’s offices. I haven’t seen any cats at any of these places. (Why would you even want to go there anyway?)
  12. people walk their dogs and carry their poop in see-through bags. yuck.
  13. people keep their animals in their yards by sending electric shocks through their bodies if they try to escape
  14. they still don’t have my ice cream on sale
  15. you are the only creature who has loved me unconditionally, and I will never forget you.
  16. these numbers will all turn to number one when I post this:(