Sunday, December 13, 2015


     Yesterday afternoon, we had the distinct pleasure of hearing our marvelous North Carolina Symphony perform music from “Frozen.” It was especially beautiful in Wilmington’s newest jewel, Cape Fear Humanities and Fine Arts Center, where the acoustics are phenomenal. The theme from this film that I have never seen resonates with me, as it was to be my mantra for 2015:  Let It Go. Well, guess what, I haven’t. So what does this mean?

     When we can’t let things go, this implies carrying around negatives that have bothered us, not forgiving when people have wronged us, not accepting things about ourselves that we may be working hard to change. So what’s wrong with that? Lots of people walk around feeling this way. Yup, they do, Virginia, and let me tell you why this is pointless. The negatives that we keep in our minds and hearts show up on our faces, in our muscles and in our organs. These negatives are not only physically unhealthy, they are emotionally damaging and not to those who have “caused” them; they damage us. They make us resentful, cynical, tense, crabby and sad. So why do we hang onto them? Duh. Because we don’t know how to let them go, or perhaps because the only way we know to let them go is to confront, and confronting is not an option. 

     I promised myself last January that “Let It Go” was to be my daily morning promise. Have I let some things go? Yes. I abandoned some unrealistic goals. I took many time-sensitive projects off the “urgent” to do list. I got a little more organized in certain areas of my life so as to prevent issues with certain people. I voiced my needs—-a concept that I’ve never mastered. All of these things helped, but I still have not let some things go that would free me of fretting and obsessing. So what to do?

     Confront. No, I will not confront others; I will confront myself. I will honestly ask myself what I am gaining by holding onto certain feelings and, one by one, I will try to let them go. I know it won’t be easy, but to wake up each day knowing there is no emotional residue from a conversation, a silence, a “look,” a misunderstanding—this is very liberating. I begin every day feeling grateful and energized for so many things, yet, I still cling to the negative leftovers. I will throw them away, let them go even if I don’t understand. I will philosophize about them, if necessary, This will allow me to prevent one more wrinkle on my brow. Yup, Virginia, that’s what I will do. I will “Let It Go.”