Monday, July 18, 2016

     With all the advances in technology, it appears that the techies have forgotten a few essential innovations that are greatly needed these days. We need an 800 number that we can call in case:

     we run out of Edy’s Caramel Delight
     we feel like crap and need a lift
     we need something lifted (like our jowls or our butt cheeks)
     we need someone silenced (like the woman at the luncheon who needs to tell you every effen detail of her story that includes people you don’t know or would not care to know.)
     we need someone to come quickly to prove our spouse wrong
     we need someone to snore loudly in our spouse’s year
     we run out of money before payday

     We need an “I’m right” app. This would flash wildly on his phone with laughing hyena accompaniment.

     We need a “Call the maman” app for children who spend more time  thumbing their yoga instructors than their parents.

    We need a pop-up cook when we’re not in the mood to prepare dinner (again).

     We need a “pet-for-an-hour” app for those who would like to play with a pet but don’t want to take care of it.

     We need a “Grandma” app for those of us grandmas who would like one of our own.

What app do you need?