Monday, November 28, 2016

               

                  Workout Prep for Women Over Seventy

Jane Fonda DVD:

  1. Search for disc
  2. Look in knitting basket
  3. Try looking in the lingerie drawer beneath the Spanx
  4. Locate disc
  5. Put on disc
  6. Find leg warmers
  7. Look in bottom of bed
  8. Locate leg warmers
  9. Turn up volume to 26
  10. Inhale
  11. Roll head around neck
  12. Reach for the ceiling
  13. Exhale
  14. Rest

Rodney Yee Yoga for Beginners

  1. Search for disc
  2. Locate disc
  3. Look for blue mat
  4. Take out from under cat
  5. Lie down on mat
  6. Inhale
  7. Clear Mind
  8. Wake up


Bike ride

  1. Find bike
  2. Find helmet
  3. Put on helmet
  4. Turn helmet around
  5. Get on bike
  6. Push pedals
  7. Go
  8. After 15 minutes, go back and zero out odometer
  9. Get back on bike
  10. Ride
  11. After 10 minutes, get off bike. Sit down between lines of bike lane and rest.
  12. Flip off cyclist with fuchsia spandex 
  13. Duck to avoid gunshot

Floor Exercises

  1. Wash Floor
  2. Take nap