Thursday, December 29, 2016

     The absolute worst loneliness is when you are alone around other people. A human’s greatest need is to connect with others. Without that connection, there is a void that for some can be intolerable. This is not to say that being alone isn’t healthy. The difference between being alone and feeling lonely is huge. Lonely is that lack of connection—the feeling of being isolated, left out, even rejected. I have lived lonely, and I have been alone. I choose to avoid lonely at all costs, and I cherish my alone time. 

     Who makes you feel lonely? People who make us feel this way are those who don’t understand communication. They talk with no purpose, no message and no reason. They are uninterested in anyone, and they have no empathy. If they could hear themselves, they would understand why they leave people around them feeling lonely. We all know those who look through us. These people talk through us. Their need is to satisfy self, period.

     If you have been in a relationship where you feel lonely, you know that this union is in for trouble. Intimacy connects; loneliness separates. I have spent a lot of time with people who have made me feel lonely, and I always blamed myself. Guess what, it wasn’t all me. If you are feeling lonely around someone you see often, ask yourself what you are taking away from this relationship and if it’s worth the emptiness you carry away with you.

     People who are depressed are often lonely. This doesn’t mean they are isolated from their friends and family; it means they feel no connection with them. 

     Cherish your time alone to think, reflect, pray, or just be. If you’re lonely, perhaps it’s time for an inventory of the people you frequent.